GuanAd's Haven

This CF Camp was one of the best camp that I had had in years. The returns and lessons I got from it was simply so MUch. To tell u the truth, I had actually very much felt "forced" to go for the camp initially. The thought of not being able to see and spend time with jo on thurs, fri was horrid. I felt half of the world taken away from me. However, both guan and I know that we had to be at this camp. In my mind, I thought I was doing God a favour by going to the camp, to support and boost the morale of the youths. And so I went to the camp.. feeling so sorry for myself that I had to sacrifice so much of my precious time.
However, the 2 short days of the camp really totally changed my mentality. In fact I'm feeling so childish and stupid. I actually felt great when people recognised and sympathized with my sacrifice. Hey see.. "I'm doing this for the Lord". I felt rather unbalanced when other CF members could not avail themselves to stay. I mean it's like "why I must and why not they" kind of feeling lor.
However, I realised that actually there were many others who made even greater sacrifices for this camp. For Chris who had taken 1/2 day to settle logistics for the camp (when he seldom take leave one) and being such a great support; guan who is definately much busier than me and having more respns; lim yong who was not feeling well and practically did not have a proper sleep through the camp; annie and evon also staying thru though their workload is equally or more shit as mine; cuiyun who could be bothered to come in and out of the camp even though she's like super busy in work and studies n have major test 40% weightage on monday; not only them... but also the com people..mee lin having to study and do tutorials in camp; tongli burdened with great respns in the midst of exam prep in a few weeks time.... and so much so much more others whom I may not know.. these people, they just simply gave it for the Lord and not a single complain.Gosh! Suddenly.. I'm asking myself.. "Hey what a shame I've been."
This camp taught me a great lesson. God didn't need me to be there.. He had so many
other people who were willing to lay their lives for Him.. In fact, it was an opportunity from God for me, not so much serve him, but drawing closer to my Lord. Was I willing to lay my life for the Lord?? This camp msg was for me.. not the youths only.. IT was for ME.
Truthfully, this is a heartfelt lesson. Thank God for teaching me.
On top of spiritual lessons, I had a great time fellowshipping with some other people. Like Jacinth who actually prayed for me..hm.. in God's work, this sort mutual support is just so sweet and encouraging. I had a great time playing murderer and polar bears. C'mon lor.. I was in the 007 bang bang ah era. All in all, personally this camp had made me realised much about my wrong thoughts and ways. Come to think of it, the tiredness was bearable and missing of jo too was bearable.... it wasn't much of a problem. God understood it all...

We had a great time with Jo today. I thank God for everything made well..and 1 more thing I have to add.. the planning of the camp was SUper! I totally enjoyed myself. Praise God!

Today is the first day of returning to work after a whole long 2 months break. It could be summarised in one word.. Shack! Its 5pm now and I am currently writing this post while waiting for my subject head to return from her meeting; we have an accounts dept meeting later on.. Oh Dear! In fact,I had just finished a 2 hr workshop on some new e-learning software..some course which is compulsory but I won't be able to add in to my learning hours.

I brought my breast pump out but there isn't any time I can find long enough to pump it out. Its been almost 12 hrs since I last pumped. Wow!!!
The classes I attended today were horrid, having to spend at least 10 mins on getting them settled. I am tired out. In fact, my last meal was at 10 am. Hm.. and i miss jo. Have got to rush home to pump milk for him before going to visit ivy later on.. and return home to pump milk again and sleep for another 5 hrs before the new day starts again. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. (I wonder what time the meeting will end??)By the way, saw some notes on the staff meeting and I was allocated chinese orchestra. CHINESE ORCHESTRA??

You make me feel brand new

I am but a foolish man with
only love in his heart
The rain may come, the sun may set,
but I'll never let you go
All I need is your love, to hear
you say that I am your man
So tell me now and show me how
I could be your better man

*And I'll surrender everything just to be with you
There is no one in the world like you You make me real
*And I'll cross every ocean just to be with you
Baby you're my dream and you're my soul
You make me real

副歌：
Just like a flame
You're burning in my soul
You wake me from the cold
You make me real

And like a flame
You brighten up my world
Every corner bears a print of you
You really make me feel brand new

Like a flame
You glow within my heart forever more
You make me feel brand new
(重复 *, 紧接 '副歌'部分)

Its 11 pm now and I should be feeling very sleepy. Woke up at 6.30 am today as I had a very uncomfortable sleep throughout the night. Nights without Guan can be quite weird. Usually we would wait for each other to return before we retired for the night. My eyes are still wide open as if they are waiting to see guan at the doorstep. On the other hand, my body is tired out by the day's work and I am lying across our king size bed updating this blog.

The phone rings..Yeah! guan just called. Feels great to hear his voice even though I feel like breaking down when I'm on the phone. Hahahaa..so WEAK! Anyway its good to know that he's fine.

This day was the 1st day in at least a year I beat the alarm before it rang. After my daily routine of pumping milk, I went for a jog to the park for some exercise on the fitness equipments. After the short half hour, I realised that I could not even do a proper sit-up... not even a single one..suddenly my stomach seemed to be filled with slabs of skin and meat that there isn't a single muscle there I could lift myself up with. ".. caesar was only 2 months ago.." hm..some self comfort.
I managed to catch Jo wide awake this afternoon. He was at that time listening to "If you're happy and u know it say Amen!" Everytime "Amen", his mouth will be wide open.. haha.. very cute. I feel that he's getting to recognise me; how lovely!
Today there was also some progress in the accounts. Got to keep it going! Thereafter was dinner with ah bon. Poor girl, all tired and sick of her job. Will remember you in prayers.
"Hao meili" was a good companion for the last hour. And now another 2 surfing thru some blogs and writing this one. I have to sleep now.. going to pour some dom for a better sleep.. hopefully...nites.

Like a flash, the end of my 2 months unpaid maternity leave is going into its last week. I realised that there are still many more unaccomplished things in my "To do" list.

Slap with the reality that this holiday is coming to an end, I found myself rushing through the accounts; digging my brains into the reconciliation and cracking it to enter weird transactions. I sort of promised it to be done by last Oct.. now in the middle of march, I'm still tying up loose ends. This is a tough one. Hopefully it can be finished soon.

I also intended to go down to BBDC to book my advance theory for my 3rd trial after being absent for the first two tests. Its either out of the way or my plain lazyness and nothing is done yet. ...And there I am complaining and feeling sad for myself when I see those younger than me passing their driving test.

In 6 days, Jo will be 2 months old. The suit which we bought for him to wear on the day of hospital discharge is now tight-fit, a vast difference from 2 months ago where he seemed so tiny in it. In another few months, he will out-grow his baby clothing and in years before I can catch up, he will be an adult. When I get back to work, I think I will miss seeing him during lunch time, watching him sleep, drink his milk and sometimes even talking and playing with him. The time spent in the afternoons with him may be short but sure it will come to be treasured moments when I will spend the afternoons on ECAs, marking and planning.

And indeed.. time waits for no man but leaves treasured memories and lessons as its footprints.

I intended to wake up at 7am today having a whole day's of work lined up for me to plough on..

Ended up waking from some stupid dreams of buying koropok in some supermarket at 11 am instead. By the time I got down to start on doing the NGP accounts it was already 5pm. After working at it for barely 1 n 1/2 hr, I am sitting at my study desk, free-riding 933 radio coming from my neighbours downstairs and surfing through some blogs.

I wonder when I can really get down to do what I planned to do. Just as I was a slack in the studying days, I see this also in my housewife and working life. Hm...

k got to get back to work now! (Suppose to be jogging at 7pm.. think that will have to be canceled.)

Drudgery is the touchstone of character - Oswald chambers

During the boring times of life, God is working to instill His character in us. Drudgery is our opportunity to experience the presence of the Lord. —David McCasland

Day 1: arrived Bangkok international airport on TG404, received by tour representative holding card "teo" and "yeo". Transferred to Baiyoke sky hotel located at the pratunum area. After the check in and putting off our baggage, we took a cab to the Chatuchak market (A must see). There were about 5,000 stalls according to Annie selling goods ranging from food,clothes to porcelain and potted plants. Stalls were differentiated by sections and it seemed like a never ending pasar malam. Stuff were cheap, mostly 100/200 bhat. A worthwhile afternoon of shopping to we finally left when the stalls were closing. I thought of taking the mrt back to the hotel and wa lou!It was a super bad choice. The station was so far away from the hotel and the tickets were only 40 baht ie. $1.60 cheaper than taking a cab. Guan almost killed me for my stupid suggestion. I think we walked for almost 1/2 hr before we saw our hotel. By the time guan finished trying on his purchases and me pumping out milk, it was already 10pm. Settled for room service. It was at Spore food court price, good meal except for the chef recommendation emince pork, I think the chef better don't recommend in future.

Day 2: Woke up at 8am to start our day of shopping. Went to the 78th floor for buffet breakfast. The view was breathtaking. Now we really know how bad Bangkok's traffic congestion is. Food spread was average though guan enjoyed the papayas. He had a great time clearing his bowels.
first stop was some sightseeing at Jim thompson's house. Not bad a tourist attraction with guided tour. I was happy to enter at half price cos below 25. Good ah?
Proceeded to the much-heard MBK. Hm.. started looking for the 199baht shoe shops around. Put back everything that cost more than that. Bought 2 pairs of shoes. Guan bought an expensive pack of briefs. He had to or nothing to wear liao. haha.. anyway, we din't really enjoy MBK much.. think there were about 10 - 20 stalls selling the same stuff. Had lunch at a hongkong restaurant where guan felt cheated on the $12 watery bird nest. The shrimp noodle and crab meat rice was tasty enough. We then proceeded to Siam square. I would never wanna go there unless I have a no-limit gold card. When shopping was at saturation, we took a cab down to Chinatown. This is the most weird Chinatown I've seen. Mostly wholesales. (Saw a shop selling all kinds of weight scales.) By the time we got there the shops were closing, we just toured the alleys looking for sharks fin soup. Fortunately we were compensated with a terrific meal and free gek huey water.

We took a cab back to the hotel to catch some rest before the cabaret show at 10pm. Since there were few things to unload, we headed for the foot massage at the hotel lobby. It was good! 350 baht ($15) each. The only turn-off was when guan received a call from boss. Worse still, we missed the transfer to the cabaret show and I was sort of reprimanded by the staff "where have u been, driver waited for u for 15 mins. What time did the voucher state? U have to take a taxi there now" Yes mdm, we were having foot massage a few metres away.

The highlight of the day was the cabaret show. Guan was disturbed by his call and was kept busy. Hm.. what a spoiler. Anyway, we were seated on the first row. Our legs half a metre from the stage. Poor or lucky Guan caught the eye of the he-shes. They came up to shook his hand only, invited him to sit on the stage, made eyes at him and even kissed him. Oh how funny! I wonder if he had their faces coming to him in his dream. I was still warning him before the show started that I would kill him if he participated. Haha.. In the end, I was kept laughing all the time. He was a good sport. Save for my Gin tonic becoming sprite, I had a fun time and guan was cheered up.

Thereafter we took a cab to patpong, the area of nightspots and pasar malam. We had given up on searching the driver. They earned 200 baht from us. Patpong had at least 7-8 clubs all with pole dancing girls. Many bouncers shoving "pussy open the bottle shows" menu into our faces. Like kings cross in Aust. In case if you were thinking if the show's good, we gave that a miss. Too crude for us. Pasar malam was at GREAT mark up. The same pair of shoes we bought at 199 baht, they were asking for 850baht. Crazy! Upon seeing my shock face, the lady said, "oh i remember you" punched in 350 on the calculator. Er..

Day 3: This day we wanted to cover the pratunum market but the shops were hardly opened. Went to shop for a salon where guan had "the most worth hair cut" of his life. I had some great pedicure for only $8. Good stuff. Am still admiring it now..Guan was not so lucky. He walked out of the salon with almost no hair. Only missing the number plate 1234 and the stripe prisoner pjs. Haahahhaa... Ok. Its not that bad lah! Still handsome.
We decided to spend the rest of the day with some good massage at the hotel's fitness club. It was like some spa. Great thai massage at only 412 baht each. Much better then the one we had at MBK 300 baht. There were robes to change, soft lightings and skilled massuers. Ah yun should try this.

Finally it was time to depart to the airport and fly back home. We misses jotham greatly. Had one last Tom yam soup at the thai restaurant before we left. Thought Guan was only good at Changi? He was equally ya ya about us taking a bus to the plane. I was a real mountain tortoise at that matter. Din't know.. Anyway now we are back home.

I suppose this trip also put an end to all my paranoia and hormonal rages. Thank God for keeping us safe and my hubby for accompanying me in between his busy schedule at work. It was a lovely anniversary!

10. When you are having a foot massage at Bangkok's highest hotel and your dear boss calls to ask about work. All this while you are rushing to catch a cabaret show.

09. When you cut your hair in an unknown hairdressing salon in Bangkok and the hairdresser misinterpretes "short" as "botak". Meanwhile, your wife is having a good laugh and enjoys her pedicure. And, you have less hair now than your baby boy.

08. When you wake up perpetually late over the last 2 weeks and have to cab to office. And all of a sudden, you wake up very early while on a holiday to cab to shopping centres. "Seize the day!" Tell me about it.

07. When you get rapped for your staff's actions by your boss and you can't lash out at your staff because it's not professional and not encouraging - the manager must act as the buffer between top management and staff. In other words, "blame absorber".

06. When you want to complete the Bible in a year and realise that it's now March and you are barely 10% through. And you act like a complete clown while facilitating a book discussion during a church meeting.

05. When you are gorging and putting on weight substantially and you still attribute the weight gain to nicotine withdrawal symptoms i.e. self delusion. And your wife keeps describing you as round-round and you are paranoid with diabetes, high blood and all.

04. When you nod off during a Lance Lambert message at the church's mezzanine amidst laughter in the main hall and your baby boy's cries in the prayer room. Then, you wake up and smile stupidly, not knowing what you're smiling about.

03. When your alcoholic demands seem to be increasing at an increasing rate and the total purchase of alcohol at DFS far exceeds your shopping bills at Bangkok. And your Tequila Sunrise tastes like mandarin orange syrup i.e. not alcoholic enough.

02. When you've been trying to exercise 3 times a week, and that turns into carrying weights i.e. baby and finger exercise i.e. typing. All this while your physical training test is slightly less than 2 months away.

01. When 3 transvestites/gays i.e. he-shes and he-who-acted-as-a-she kissed and made a pass at you during a cabaret show, and all the while, you wife is laughing with GEE!