GuanAd's Haven

In my brief time with Ad yesterday night - I realised that the total time I spent with her totalled less than 5 hrs - she asked me the titled question. Now, Ad always had exciting stories to tell me amidst her complaints about the incredulously irritating students she handled every day. You just have to separate the wheat from the chaff sometimes.

Well, this time, it was that one of her colleague teachers is going to leave service and be a missionary teacher i.e. go to 3rd World countries to spread gospel and be a teacher. Apparently, this teacher had, after her O levels, wanted to serve the Lord full time but her pastor uncle (who was the one that passed away because of SARS) had asked her to study further so that she could be more equipped to serve in future.

Ad and I reflected for a few seconds while eating fishball noodles and ice jelly. Amidst the hustle and bustle we experienced everyday, deep in our hearts, we know we are totally unsatisfied with the lives we're living. Well, it could be partly due to discontentment - Ad had been reiterating her rhetoric for umpteen times that "Life is meaningless" - but ultimating it boiled down to this: we don't know what we really want.

I'm not too keen on the Purpose Driven Life - honestly, I find that it's just another book that tells you what you'd already know, nothing inspiring. I mean, I already know that I have a purpose, but after 26 years and 7 months, I'm still pretty clueless on what I really want to do. I realised that after all, I'm not really like Jacob - this guy really knew what he wanted.

Ok, off and on, you talk to friends/colleagues about the Lord and try to serve in whatever capacity you can on Sat/Sun. Can that be my purpose? Not that I'm underwhelmed about what I'm doing now but hey, is this just my purpose - nothing else?

Just last year after Jonathan Pong came to Singapore, David Hung jested that we should set a goal 2010 ala the Singapore soccer campaign - where we would go China to spread the gospel, just like what Jon Pong did. I'm pretty thrilled by the idea - I looked at what Edwin/Mary are doing and something kept challenging me - are you doing enough for the Lord?

I think and I feel that I should do some mission work, at least in my entire lifetime. I do think it adds more meaning to merely serving/attending church camps. Not for personal gratification really but to lift my existing 1-dimensional spiritual life, which is very unfulfilling.

I would really like to embark on the goal 2010 and perhaps serve for 2 weeks as a start. Anyone interested to join me, please let me know. Perhaps my lovely wife can support me in this plan - we might even beat the 5 hours we meet every week while serving the Lord.